American Idol Recap

The Show was in Denver last night.  Why, can someone tell me, was Victoria Beckham back?  Apparently, the executive producers didn’t read my scathing memo about her mediocre performance and her completely unacceptable skinny ass. She is way too thin. Thin people cannot be trusted and they all should be put on a tropical island so when a hurricane hits they can blow out to sea in collective lump. Anyway I will ignore her presence altogether as protestation.

Whereas last week in Dallas the freak show was less obvious the freaks came out of the woodwork in the mile high city last night.  There was the football quarterback who was so full of himself that he was twins.  His hair was better than his singing. I am not sure how showing him riding a moped plays into his manly (football player), yet sensitive (musician) image – it added a geek factor to Austin instead.  Another unsuccessful audition was from nerd extraordinaire, Kenny Everett.  I can’t remember what he sang but it ironically it had the lyric, go, go, go in it, which made Simon’s rejection line, very easy.  Just Go!

The freakiest show of all was the bikini guy who apparently was inspired by last year’s bikini girl.  Yikes!  He was so ugly and shocking in it is skimpy two-piece that the judges just left the room without even getting him a chance to sing.  Of course it was all staged, but it was a good ending to a pretty good show.

There were some great auditions for this show.  I loved Danielle Hayes who sang the great Melissa Ethridge song, “I’m the only One.”  Her interesting back story of being a karaoke bar host and the corporate world stomping her dreams was moving and hit home for me.  She was engaging honest, and her audition was truly moving.

Next week the queen of television, Ellen DeGenres joins American Idol.  There is much hype about this, of course it is sweeps – so Fox is hoping that the ratings of Idol will spike once the funny and genial talk show hosts touches down in Paula’s old chair.  Speaking of Paula, I heard “I’ll Always Be Your Girl” on the radio when driving back to work from lunch today.  It just put a big lump in my throat.  I sure do miss Ms. Messy.  Paula, if you are reading this, I hope you’re safe and warm in a leopard print snuggie with faux fur trim.